I am going to get pretty personal in today's blog.
This is raw. This about self esteem issues. This is about serious, serious stuff. This is about me.
I hope that you get value from this. I hope that you learn a little about words and their potential; both good and bad.
I want to take you back to the late 1970's and early to mid-1980's.
By no stretch of the imagination was I the cool kid in elementary school. I fit in and I stayed out of trouble. My grades were OK, I had friends, I played sports. I didn't stick out much. I was a pretty normal kid. I crushed on girls like most of the boys but, heck, I was like 10 years old. Life was pretty normal and so was I.
In 5th grade I had a crush on a girl named Lana. I was just a crush. I was a normal kid and she was a normal girl. No big deal.
Then we moved.
In the middle of my 5th grade year I switched to a new school and had to make new friends. It was all good. In 6th grade both schools came back together for middle school. My crush would be back in my classes again in no time.
The school ended and summer came and went.
6th grade. Lana.
Back in those days you kept your crushes to yourself or you maybe told your best friend. Early in the school year I honestly don't remember how it happened but some of the cool girls found out that I had a crush on Lana.
My fragile world was about to change and for good or bad my self image was about to be defined.
I am no child psychologist but around this time kids are developing into who they are going to be. Certain moments and events help to shape that.
Lana, I believe, helped me to go in a direction that I'm not sure was best.
OK, here is the story. To be transparent, this stings still a little even though it was 30 years ago.
I was in science class and a couple of the cool girls were behind me at a table with Lana. They didn't know that I could hear them but I could hear every word. I remember what they said to this day...
Cool girl to Lana: "You know Rick likes you. What do you think of him?"
Lana: "He's scum."
Scum.
My tender heart liked a girl and my tender heart now knew that I was scum.
Of course it was one girl and it was 6th grade. I get that.
For many years after that I considered myself to be ugly. I struggled to talk to girls. I struggled in every way where it came to relationships with girls.
It took me many, many years to break out of that mold. From that moment I pushed myself super hard at what I could PROVE which was being an athlete.
I really struggled for a lot of years with that person / athlete balance.
Am I blaming Lana for anything? No. I am simply looking back at a landmark of my life and trying to explain why it went the way that it did.
So what is the lesson here? How does it relate to fitness?
There are a couple of points I will make.
First, I want to say that I was wrong. I guess that is the first point. I mistakenly let some silly girl who said something stupid effect me and CHANGE me.
Obviously I am over my self esteem issues. Check out my super hot wife.
DON'T DO THAT. Words from others should NEVER define who you are. Teach your kids what. You definition of yourself is one that you create.
That being said, don't tell others who are what they are.
Gosh, I wish I could go back in time and instead of letting the words of a 6th grade girl affect me I should have told myself that I am better than that and I am better then her.
(For he record, I changed the name of the actual girl. I found the girl that called me scum on Facebook. She probably doesn't remember and I don't want her to come across this blog have her feel bad about that moment so many years ago.)
We can't go back so all we can do is learn and apply.
The second lesson or the second part of my message is this: Let YOUR words BUILD people up. Be kind, say good things, speak words of affirmation to anybody and everybody.
True. A girl in fall of 1984 said something that affected me in a NEGATIVE way for many years of my life.
How about something YOU say have a POSITIVE impact on someone for many, many years?
My prayer for you today is this: say something is confidence or out loud so that world can hear that build someone up and helps to change him or her.... FOR THE GOOD.
Thanks for reading. I know today's topic was a little different. I know it was a little away from health and fitness.... or was it?
True fitness and wellness isn't about what goes on in the workout area. True wellness start with what goes on between your ears.
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